"Always be a first rate version of yourself and not a second rate version of someone else."
I think one of the obstacles in going through a challenging time is acknowledging how deeply our personalities, strengths, and weaknesses play into how we process the situation. I have spent a little too much time beating myself up that I'm not a different version of 'tough', or that I don't have someone else's ability to gloss over something like it never happened.
The truth is, I feel deeply and I want to take things that are broken and make them new. I want to get an "A" in everything I do, so being ok with being in a "C" sort of place for a season is really tough for me. It can make me feel like a failure.
But then I remind myself that graded tests and papers and projects are not how life works at 30. I can't possibly ace everything, and if I'm really honest, failing miserably (my mental spin on the situation) is a chance for me to be humbled and more in touch with the truth of life and the people who are living it.
I just keep praying that the fruit of this season is
sweet kick butt amazing. I've already experienced so much compassion and grace from those in my close circle or supporters, so I have no reason to doubt that the God of all healing is working it all together for good. I just have to keep looking for it.